No matter at what point of your life you are, you will always be busy. Whether it be family, school, work or some other thing, we all see days fly by. Who would have thought we’d get to the end of 2019 so quickly for example!
Because of this constant busyness, we just let ourselves follow the flow of life and quickly end up surrounded by the first people we meet.
Nothing wrong with that, of course. After all, people who surround us are not entirely random.
Even though they may not be chosen per se, willingly meeting more than once some of them means some kind of connection existed in the first place.
However, to be able to get the best out of our life, we also need to find people who inspire us and can motivate us to do great.
Those can be not only hard to find but particularly complicated to notice.
Indeed, we’ve all met some incredible people but it sometimes takes time to realize the big impact they could have had on our life, had we kept them in it.
The reason those tend to go unnoticed comes down to a lack of awareness of what we need in our life.
Luckily, this can be fixed quite easily so you don’t let such people pass you by ever again.
1. Discover who you are first
Unfortunately easier said than done, this is a step we cannot skip.
After all, if you expect to find people who fit you, you first need to understand what “You” means.
This can take weeks, months, or even years depending on how committed to finding yourself you are, but the steps themselves are not that difficult.
It all comes down to looking within yourself to become self-aware.
While there is only one step for this to happen, spending time reflecting on your life and who you are, there are many ways to become self-aware.
My favorite and what I consider the best is to write yourself to awareness.
2. Create two lists
After understanding yourself, you can make a list of qualities you either aspire to have or that you already have but want others to have to create synergy.
This will help you notice the ones some the people in your circle will already or the ones nobody has.
By understanding which ones you need, you can notice them faster.
After having looked at the positive — the qualities you want — , creating a list of the flaws you wish to avoid is the way to go.
You will thus become able to understand why some people steal your good mood and energy. Those should be the ones you should stop hanging out with or at least do it less.
If you don’t mention to anybody that you are in the middle of this process, this step can be very easy to put into practice. If you do mention it to your circle, this might create tensions so I would recommend not letting people know. For now at least.
After finding out who you are and what kind of people you want around you, you can now start verifying whether your observations were correct.
Identify some people who, based on your reflection, should stop being in your circle and try to see them less or not at all. Do you feel less drained as a whole?
Similarly, try spending more time with people who you expect would pump you up. Do you feel more energized?
You will be wrong here and there, without fault.
Finding the right people is a trial and error task and it just gets easier the more you do it. Not only will you understand yourself better but you will also be more attentive to the right signs to identify the people you need.
If you make this a regular task, I can assure you, you’ll be feeling happier and more energized day after day soon enough,